Premature ejaculation is one of the most common sexual problems. The condition is most often described as being an inability to delay ejaculation to a point when it is mutually desirable for both partners. The definition of when ejaculation is premature is subjective. While some men have trouble controlling their orgasm upon entry, others consider 5-10 minutes of copulation too little time. How long a man is able to last is not the important factor in diagnosing premature ejaculation. The crucial issue is if a man is satisfied with the length of coitus.
Premature ejaculation occurs when a man reaches orgasm and ejaculates too quickly and without control. In other words, ejaculation occurs before a man wants it to happen. It may occur before or after beginning foreplay or intercourse. Some men experience a lot of personal distress because of this condition.
The number 1 cause of premature ejaculation is an uncontrollable and overwhelming urge to ejaculate, produced from over-stimulation by your lover. This urge seems impossible to fight, or so people think! Your body reacts like this to ensure impregnation and the survival of our species. So basically it's a natural reaction. A natural reaction that you can alter. You know it can be altered because some men don't suffer from premature ejaculation and if it's a natural reaction it can't be a physical problem. So there is nothing medically wrong with you.
It's one of the commonest of all sexual problems. Recently, we did a survey of several thousand British males, and approximately 10 per cent of them said that they 'often' or 'sometimes' had this trouble. We found that it's commoner in younger men - which is not surprising, as there's a distinct tendency for it to improve with age. Men generally get better control as they grow older. However, a 2004 survey in Europe showed that middle-aged men still have this problem. Fortunately, good treatments are available. (read more on early ejaculation)
More on early ejaculation
Ejaculation is a reflex that, once a certain level of stimulation is reached, is automatic. Controlling the ejaculatory reflex requires that the man be able to recognize and regulate the amount of stimulation he is experiencing so that he does not reach the level that will trigger the ejaculatory reflex before he wants to.
Although premature ejaculation is one of the most common male sexual disorders, it remains widely under-diagnosed and under-treated. Most physicians do not screen for premature ejaculation and patients are extremely reluctant to talk about the condition with their partners or health care professionals. premature ejaculation can have a significant impact on many aspects of a man's life. It can affect his and his partner's sexual satisfaction and their ability to build and maintain relationships - both sexual and non-sexual - and can impact a man's general sense of self-confidence.
The main cause of premature ejaculation is biological. Upon sexual stimulation and arousal, the normal physical responses for a man and a woman are similar. A man will achieve a climax and then ejaculate about two to three minutes after penetrating the vagina. Women will reach orgasm about 12 to 14 minutes after intercourse occurs. Many women do not achieve orgasm especially if only penetration of the vagina by the penis occurs during sexual activity. Many women achieve orgasm through other methods of sexual stimulation although for some, orgasm is not achieved under any circumstances nor with any type of stimulation. Roughly 10% of women fall into this category. Other causes of premature ejaculation include psychological factors such as marital and relationship issues; performance anxiety (with partners new to each other and especially in the inexperienced partner); fear (associated with concerns regarding getting caught or discovered, sexually transmitted diseases or potential pregnancy ); and guilt (believing the activity is sinful e.g., premarital or extramarital sex).
Finally, there's no question that anxiety plays a part in many cases of premature ejaculation. If you're nervous, you're likely to come too quickly. That's why many males have discovered for themselves that a small amount of alcohol eases their nerves and makes them less likely to climax prematurely. But we wouldn't recommend alcohol as a treatment!
early ejaculation
The emergence of sexual tension and relationship difficulties are greatly reduced if sexual activity occurs under these circumstances: only after the partners know each other well and are comfortable with one another. Both partners consent to sexual intimacy without feeling pressured. Sexual activity should occur in a private and relaxed setting. In addition, contraception issues should be discussed, decided and acted upon by the couple.
Behavioral therapy is one possible approach for treating premature ejaculation. Most commonly, the "squeeze technique" is used. If a man senses that he is about to experience premature orgasm, he interrupts sexual relations. Then the man or his partner squeezes the shaft of his penis between a thumb and two fingers. The man or his partner applies light pressure just below the head of the penis for about 20 seconds, lets go, and then sexual relations can be resumed. The technique can be repeated as often as necessary. When this technique is successful, it enables the man to learn to delay ejaculation with the squeeze, and eventually, to gain control over ejaculation without the squeeze. Behavioral therapy helps 60% to 90% of men with premature ejaculation. However, it requires the cooperation of both partners. Also, premature ejaculation often returns, and additional behavioral therapy may be needed. Squeeze Methods: this method involves either the man or his partner squeezing (fairly firmly) the end or the tip of the penis for 10 to 20 seconds when ejaculation is imminent, withholding stimulation for about 30 seconds, then continuing stimulation. This can be repeated until ejaculation is desired. The stop and start method can be used with the squeeze method as well.
A common side effect of one class of antidepressants is "sexual dysfunction." These Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRI) medications such as Prozac, Zoloft, Paxil, Celexa, and others, actually can inhibit the ability to ejaculate. Because of this, they have been used by some clinicians in the treatment of premature ejaculation. Your doctor or therapist can give you more information on this treatment. (read more on early ejaculation)
early ejaculation - Tips
Appreciate whole-body sensuality. Men often think sex happens only in the penis and only during intercourse. That view is a one-way ticket to uncontrolled ejaculation (not to mention erection problems, and women with those proverbial headaches). The best sex involves head-to-toe arousal. Men learning how to approach -- but not arrive at -- their point of no return, need to appreciate whole-body sensuality, the pleasure potential in every square inch of the body. Whole-body sensuality releases tension. Tense bodies that have no other outlet often find release through involuntary ejaculation. But as you learn to appreciate sensual pleasure from head to toe, whole-body arousal takes the pressure off your penis, and you last longer.
It's important to understand that learning ejaculatory control takes time and practice. You may feel a little awkward along the way. Try to maintain a sense of humor about any accidental spills.
The man-on-top (missionary) position can be fun, but it's harder for most men to control their ejaculatory timing, because they have to hold themselves up. Try making love with the woman on top. This position is more relaxing for men, and it often helps ejaculatory control.